The Real Life Groups Leadership Podcast

Season 2 Episode 3 - Mentoring Men and Women

Welcome to Episode 3 of our 2nd Season of the Real Life Groups Leadership Podcast! In this episode Chris Short is joined by his wife Sara Short as co-host for our conversation about Mentoring. We have two seasoned Mentors in the room – Randy and Debbi McEnespy. Randy has been an elder at Real Life for many years, and Debbie is a former staff member at Real Life and is now a full-time volunteer here. Both have mentored many people, both individuals and couples, in their walk as disciples of Jesus, and we are excited to share their wisdom with you!

 

Some of the things they share:

 

• What is mentoring? How is it different from Discipleship?
• How can being mentored impact someone’s life?
• How does mentoring work in conjunction with a small group?
• Is one-on-one time important?
• Some things are more appropriate to address with a mentor than with a small group.
• How can a lack of mentorship affect our lives?
• How do you go about finding a mentor? Or finding someone to mentor?
• Do you have to be a certain age to be a mentor?
• Is the small group leader responsible to mentor all the members of their group?
• Don’t let fear hold you back!
• 2 Timothy 2:2
• One voice, speaking wisdom, can change the legacy of a family.

 

Thank you for joining us today! If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe to us on your favorite pod catcher. And please feel free to share it with others!

We have some great tools that our leadership have made available for you to use!

 

• Right Now Media: (The Netflix of Bible Studies) Real Life has gifted our people with a free membership to this platform! Find out more at this link.  https://app.rightnowmedia.org/en/user/reallifeministries

 

• Real Life Resources: This digital library contains over 500 tools and resources to help both you personally and those in your group. Podcasts, videos, books, studies and much more at this link. https://realliferesources.org/

 

If you have any questions or suggestions for future topics, feel free to email us at realforlife@reallifeministries.com.

Season 2 Episode 2: Lead Like A Shepherd

 

This month on the Real Life Groups Leadership Podcast, our host Chris Short sits down with Fred Bosse' (Groups Team Leader - Post Falls Campus) and Christian Putman (Groups Pastor - CDA Campus) to talk about how often, and why, the Bible refers to leaders as shepherds, and what does that mean to us today?

 

Some of the points they address include:

 

What does it mean to be a Shepherd?

• The Bible talks about God being a shepherd, and Jesus says "I am the good shepherd."
• The Bible also refers to people as sheep - is that a compliment?
• Why does the Bible use sheep and shepherds as an analogy so often?
• What did it mean to be a shepherd in Biblical times - was it an honored profession?
• What is God saying in Ezekiel 34 to the leaders of Israel about shepherding?
• Who are the shepherds? Isn't that just the paid staff?

What are some practical aspects of leading like a shepherd?

• You can't feed others if you are not feeding yourself. You don't bypass being a sheep yourself - you are under the care of the Good Shepherd.
• Knowing your people well is so important - know if they are not going to church and why - know the condition of their hearts.
• You may need to pursue your people outside of group to shepherd them well.
• The hired hand flees when danger comes for the sheep - don't lead with the mindset of checking a box.
• Allow God to guide you as a shepherd, seek the Holy Spirit's leading.
• The importance of Break Out Groups - Women need to be led and to lead too. (shepherdess)

 

There is no secret formula and we don't need to overcomplicate this topic - it is simply loving people well. It may not be easy, but it is simple! Leaders - what you are doing does make a difference!

 

Thank you for listening to our podcast! Be sure to subscribe - they come out on the first day of the month but we occasionally will publish bonus episodes

Some of the resources they mention in this episode are listed below:

 

The Way of the Shepherd - Kevin Leman

 

Lead like a Shepherd - Larry Osborn

 

Right Now Media - Lead like a Shepherd

 

 

We have some great tools that our leadership have made available for you to use!

 

• Right Now Media: (The Netflix of Bible Studies)

                 Real Life has gifted our people with a free membership to this platform! Find out           more at this link.  https://app.rightnowmedia.org/en/user/reallifeministries

 

• Real Life Resources: This digital library contains over 500 tools and resources to help both you personally and those in your group. Podcasts, videos, books, studies and much more at this link. https://realliferesources.org/

 

If you have any questions or suggestions for future topics, feel free to email us at realforlife@reallifeministries.com.

 

Season 2 Episode 1 - Using Curriculum and Resources in your Group

Welcome to Season 2 of the Real Life Groups Leadership Podcast! We are kicking off this season with an episode about curriculum and resources – what do we have available and how do you choose what is best for your group? Our host Chris Short – Executive Pastor at Real Life Ministries is joined this time by Sharyl Williams – Digital Resource Lead, and Derek and Heather Dalton – Groups Pastor and Women’s Discipleship Lead, all from the Post Falls Campus. We are planning to pack Season 2 of the podcast full of helpful and encouraging content – and this episode is a great start!

 

Here are some of the things they discuss:

 

1. There are many things you should take into consideration when determining what study or curriculum you should lead your group through.

• What season are you in as a group? (Just starting? Long time relationships?
• Who is in your group? What season of life are they in?
• Remember that the choice of study or topic is secondary to the goal of the group – which is growing in Spiritual maturity.
• God’s Word in any form is living and active and He is going to meet us wherever we are. The things that need to be dealt with will come up.
• When you combine God’s Word with God’s people, God’s Spirit is going to show up.

 

2. Our hearts should be that of: How are we going to help God’s people love God and love others well.

• We need to know our people well enough to be able to determine what they may need, where they need growth.

 

3. Should you follow the sermon series or go with a separate study?

• You group should not be a democracy when it comes time to choose.
• Have separate discussions to find out what people would like, that way they will feel heard and be willing to give honest suggestions rather then being swayed by the most vocal person.
• There will be times when it is important to go with a sermon series or topic that the leadership would like the church to be aligned on.
• Ultimately, as the leader you will be the best one to make a decision as to what would be the best choice for the current season.
• Be sure you take advantage of your leaders and coaches and ask them for suggestions or recommended studies.

 

4. We have some great tools that our leadership have made available for you to use!

• Right Now Media: (The Netflix of Bible Studies)
  Real Life has gifted our people with a free membership to this platform! Find out more at this link.  https://app.rightnowmedia.org/en/user/reallifeministries

 

• Real Life Resources: This digital library contains over 500 tools and resources to help both you personally and those in your group. Podcasts, videos, books, studies and much more at this link. https://realliferesources.org/

 

• We also have a page on our main website specifically for our group leaders, with training videos, announcements, and other leader resources at this link.

                 https://www.reallifeministries.com/lgresources

 

 

Thank you so much for joining us on the Real Life Groups Leadership Podcast! If you enjoy this podcast and find value in the content, please help us by subscribing and sharing it with others! If you have any questions or suggestions for future topics, feel free to email us at realforlife@reallifeministries.com.

S. 1 Ep 10: FAQ’s

In this, our tenth episode of the Groups Leadership Podcast, Chris Short: Real Life Executive Pastor is joined once again by Sara Short from our Women’s Discipleship Team with the Post Falls Campus - and Evan Meske one of our Groups Pastors, also with our Post Falls Campus.

This trio of friends (two are spouses but hopefully friends too!) take time out today to answer some of the most commonly asked questions that come up from our small group leaders. They hit some of the tough questions head on and bring a wealth of experience and wisdom to the table, with a touch of humor woven throughout.

Here are the questions they address:

     1.  When is the best time to branch a group?

      2. How should we handle Hot Topics in the group?

     3. How should we handle doctrinal issues when someone wants to turn a       secondary issue into a primary/core one?

    4. How long do we pursue someone who is a part of our group if they have stopped attending either church or group?

    5. When is it time to actually remove someone from a group?

    6. What if your group seems to be stuck?

Be sure to watch the video at the end – it is a Real Life story of a life change from a group at our North Campus. A great testimony of the impact a small group can have on the lives of the members and those around them.

You can download the complete show notes at the link below!

https://bit.ly/RLGLPEp10ShowNotes

You can find more resources like this at realliferesources.org 

S. 1 Ep.9 :Five Keys to Starting Well

Today's topic is 5 Keys to Starting Well.

With many years combined experience in leading and working with small groups, we have seen a few things that help groups succeed - in this podcast we are sharing 5 key things that we have found to be helpful in either starting or restarting a group well. Cory Speer (North Campus Groups Pastor) and Dre' Bloomer (Women's Discipleship Leader) talk with our host, Chris Short (Executive Pastor) about their first group experiences, and how important it is for groups to start well.

Here are some of the things they discuss:

• What are some challenges that might come up when kicking off groups?
• How can an expectation gap effect the group?
• You only get one chance to make a good first impression - be intentional with it!
• Sometimes it is helpful for a group to “reboot”.
• Make time for some fun!
• As we grow in relationship with each other, God is changing us and growing us in our maturity. This is the foundation of why we are getting together as a group - and why it matters.

Five Key Elements of an Effective Small Group

1. Relational Environment

2. Biblical Foundation

3. Intentional Leader

4. Reproducible Disciple Making Process

5. Church Unity

 

We hope you enjoy this episode! To find more discipleship tools go to www.realliferesources.org

To watch the video version of this episode click below:

Ep. 9: 5 Keys to Starting Well

S. 1 Ep. 8: Host Homes and Childcare

In this episode our host Chris Short sits down with Sara Short (Women's Discipleship Leader) and Shannon Kay (Women's Team Leader) who are both on staff at the Real Life Post Falls Campus. They are covering the topic of Host Homes and Childcare, and the things that impact the environment of a small group.

Some of the the topics they cover include:

- What if there are pets in the Host Home?

- Should our group be child-friendly?

- How important is it that we end on time?

- What should the group do during Holidays and Summer Break?

Setting expectations up front in a group helps avoid frustrations down the road. Each group will look a little different depending on their specific dynamics. What matters is that you have a clear and defined plan.

We are including a downloadable list that covers some of the common details you may need to work through when setting up the expectations for your group. We hope you find it helpful and that you are able to create a welcoming and safe environment where your members can grow deeper in relationship with each other and with God!

 

Click below to download the pdf:

General Expectations for Small Group Environments

S. 1 Ep 7: Stages And Seasons Of A Small Group

The two newest members to the Post Falls Adult Ministries Team, Andy Ubert and Riley Shields, talk with Chris Short today about some of the different stages and season that come up in a small group. A leader should have a good awareness of how these things can affect the dynamics and plans of a group.

Here are some of the things they cover in this episode:

• Clear Expectations
• Knowing where your people are at
• Forming, Storming, Norming, Performing
• Correct pronunciation of Minnesota 
• Using the SCMD process

There are many unique stages of a small group. A New Group of people who are just getting to know each other is in a much different stage than a group who has existing relationship and trusts each other.

There are also seasons that happen in any given year we have to be aware of. In our area that looks like 4 unique seasons - some related to weather and some related to holidays. Still others are related to the community calendar. But if we act like they don’t exist they can hurt our groups momentum.

Group leaders need to have both awareness and intentionality as they help their groups walk through some of the different stages and seasons that come up throughout the year. 

S. 1 Ep. 5: Asking Great Questions

This month Chris Short (Real Life Ministries Executive Team Leader) sits down with Heather Dalton (Real Life Women's Discipleship Leader, Post Falls Campus) and Evan Meske (Real Life Groups Pastor, Post Falls Campus) to talk about asking great questions - a very helpful topic for someone leading a small group discussion!

 

Heather and Evan are part of the Post Falls Campus team that puts together the group discussion questions that go along with the weekly sermon notes. They talk about the importance of questions in the realm of building relationships and going deeper with each other and with God.

 

"When people process out loud, they are either forming, reinforcing, or challenging their own belief systems." Evan Meske

 

Some of the things discussed in this episode are:

 

• In the New Testament Jesus asked over 300 questions that he already knew the answers to - Why?
• What is the goal of asking questions?
• What are the benefits of helping people process out-loud?
• How does answering questions in a group context encourage relationship?
• What makes asking questions an important part of discipleship?
• Is it alright for a leader to pick and choose questions rather than going through all of them?
• Why should we begin with surface level questions?
• How important are follow-up questions?
• What can a leader do about rabbit trails that happen in the group discussion?

You can find more resources at realliferesources.org 

You may also be interested in this post from Jim Putman on asking questions:

Why You Need to ask Your Disciples Questions to Help Them Grow

S. 1 Ep. 6: Discipleship Outside The Circle

In this episode Chris Short (Real Life Executive Pastor) sits down to have a conversation with Blake Whiteman (Real Life Cda Campus Pastor) and Travis Anderson (Real Life Small Group Leader) regarding what it looks like to take Discipleship outside the circle of a small group. Sometimes the time group members spend together outside of the weekly small group time can have even more impact than the time spent in the group. 

Some of the things covered in this conversation:

• Is there more to group than what happens in 90 minutes every week?
• How can I continue group time outside of the group?
• How do we earn "relational equity" with others? 
• How can I get group members connected with each other?
• How and why to be intentional about scheduling time for relationship outside of group. 
• Look for places and activities that are already in place that you could use as connect time. Go where the people are.
• We are never done growing as a disciple. 

Thank you so much for watching! You can find more resources at realliferesources.org 

If you have any questions or ideas for topics please feel free to email us at realforlife@reallifeministries.com 

S. 1 Ep.4: Landmines, Conflict and Resolution

This month Chris Short is joined by Derrick Dalton - Real Life Post Falls Campus Groups Pastor, and Wayne Burnham - Real Life Hayden Campus Groups Pastor, and they discuss how, when and why we as leaders should be prepared to deal with any conflict that might arise in and around our small groups.

Some of the topics they cover are:

• Conflict is not inevitable, but it is probable. 
• Conflict is normal when people are involved.
• There is a constructive way to build and maintain relationship even in the midst of conflict.
• Typical landmines in small group include:
  • Different doctrinal backgrounds
  • Different relational difference
  • Different cultural filters
• A landmine is a hidden issue that can be exposed.
• How do we navigate the different landmines we encounter proactively?
  • Be prayed up!
  • Utilize the Small Group Guidelines. 
  • Study and pray over the content before the group.
  • Remember we will fight for relationship and unity!

• How do we navigate the different landmines we encounter reactively?
  • Deal with it quickly.
  • Go directly to the person - Praise in public but consult in private. 
  • Own your part. 
  • Move towards unity and resolution

• Deal with things Biblically - fight for relationship not in relationship.

Next Steps:

Initiate - Communicate - and Checkmate the enemy. 

Remember that the world will know us by our love for one another - people are watching. 

Are we as disciples:

• Loving Well 
• Being Noticeable
• Living Courageously 

Remember we are never alone and never without hope. There are people here ready to help you! Reach out to a coach or a pastor. 

Guidelines for Small Group Discussions 

You can also go to realliferesources.org to find more podcasts, study guides, books and videos to help you become equipped for being and making disciples of Jesus!